THE FLASHMAN WIVES
Let me introduce Mrs. Elspeth Flashman,
and Mrs. Susie Flashman, and ...
Like many people today, Flashman has been married several times.
Unlike most contemporary people, Flashman never bothered to get a divorce!
The following is a list women, who for one reason or another, claimed or at least pretended to be Mrs. Flashman.
- Elspeth Morrison - Scottish (1839):
Daughter of John (mill owner) and Mistress Morrison of Paisley, Scotland.
Married under threat of bodily harm.
Ceremony performed in the Abbey at Paisley.
Honeymooned at a cottage on the Scottish coast near Troon.
Apparently married until Flashman's death in 1915.
- Queen Ranavalona of Madagascar - Hova (1844):
Actually a marriage ceremony was never performed, but whenever Flashman gets
married he includes her in his list of wives.
Ranavalona was last seen setting on her throne with tears of joy in her eyes
over Flashman having lived through a "truth or die" test she forced him to
take.
- Duchess Irma of Strackenz - Strackenzian (1848):
Married under the alias of Prince Carl Gustaf of Denmark.
Ceremony performed in the Cathedral at Strackenz City.
Honeymooned at the hunting lodge of Strelhow.
Duchess Irma was last seen in her bedroom at the Strackenz palace waiting
with lusty anticipation for Flashman to return from supressing a rebellion.
- Cassiopeia - American (1849): Technically not married, but
pretended to be Mrs. James B. Montague of Baton Rouge on river boat trip
from Memphis to St. Louis. Last seen in Ohio before her escape into Canada (with
$2000 US of Flashy's money). Gave Flashman a passionate kiss that made of the
old prudes flutter and exclaim disapproval.
- Susie Willinck - Cockney (1849):
Owner of New Orleans whorehouse.
Married under the alias of Beauchamp Millward Comber.
Ceremony performed on the riverboat Coctaw Queen while docked at the
levee in New Orleans.
Honeymooned on the Coctaw Queen travelling up the Mississippi to St. Louis.
Susie was deserted in the middle on the night in Sante Fa, New Mexico.
Died in 1872.
Rumored to have remarried.
- Sonsee-array - Apache (1849): Also known as Takes-Away-Clouds-Woman and
Morning Star. Daughter of Mangas Colorado (also known as Red Sleeves).
Admitted name to be Flashman, but was also known as Pinda-lickoyee (white eyes),
White-Rider-Goes-So -Fast-He-Destroys-the-Wind, He-Who-Breaks-the-Wind,
and Wind Breaker.
Ceremony performed before the old fort at Santa Rita.
Honeymooned in the Glia Forest.
Sonsee-array was last seen at the Apache camp waiting for Flashman to return from a raid.
- Valla Pencherjesky - Russian (1855):
Daughter of Count Pencherjesky of Starotorsk. Valla was actually married to
someone else and no marriage
ceremony between her and Flashy was performed. But the Count, wanting a son, encouraged Flashman to
frequently roger his daughter.
Also, Flashman stated "... I soon began to feel as though we were truly married."
Valla was last seen sprawled in the snow on the Arrow of Arabat.
- Annette Mandeville - American (1859):
Technically not married, but she pretended to be Mrs. Beauchamp Millward Comber
while travelling to New York. Last seen at the Astor House in tears worring over Flashman's safety.
- Hannah Popplewell - American (1859):
Technically not married, but she referred to Flashman as Mr. Popplewell to
obtain breakfast for two at Wager's House in Harper's Ferry. Last seen on a train
bound for Baltimore.
The Sandwich Island Chapter of the Royal Flashman Society has recently posted a feature entitled:
Flashman's Ladies.
Be sure to check it out.
Original Material © 1997 by Darrell Ambro